..Click Click Click..
So i finally got around to sorta finishing my layout. still a bit buggy here and there but im not free now la! later la ;p
Oh and if my layout is wonky on your browser its probabaly because your browsers old "=_= go update it.
..The Princess..
I am the very sin of life itself, living in a world and civilization i deem unworthy of the many now ruined perfection it was blessed with. The social
anti-social i be but thats another part of me you will
eventually see or hope to see.
I suffer from a bipolar disorder and can feel extreme happiness and sadness in the most disturbing of manner. Manic depressive some often call me or "emo
girl" for short.
But who am i really?
That girl on the street you thought was hot or perhaps that girl you laughed at the day before.
What you see is your perception of me but what you know is something that even i find much a mystery.
Yes that is me in the picture and yes that is a pink cigarette i'm holding but no i'm not a smoker. But believe what you may for doubts will inevitably
be existant.
..She Supports..
..Talk..
..Credits..
I'm Ginny; girly, emotional, rough and fundamentally retarded. Oh, mustn't forget extremely lazy and amazing at procrastination as well and err...well, clumsy (don't ask). The surname's Yap and no my full name isn't really necessary in introductions. Arrogant, stubborn and well, what more might you ask?
IM AWESOME. Nuff said.
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Wednesday, September 09, 2009
"wheres your new bf? u not very heng damn fast got new bf wan meh?"
funny how those words came from u that day but like the way u knew me, those words were true werent they? totally irrelevant to anything but those words keep replaying themselves over and over again in my head. why?
"...i can't let my feelings control me right now..."
then why did u let it before? why didnt u shut the fuck up and leave me be like u apparently had all this while before? i thought u knew my stories well enough inside out to know how it would play out somehow. did u think this time it would be any different or did u think this time i would take it all as a game?
"...i think you should just forget about this relationship..."
haha. funny. what relationship? you never really established one did you? and like as stupid as it all seems, so why? why am i still hurting from all those words u said and those short lived memories you left?
"none ginny. i swear. only you..."
i laughed when you said that.corny as hell i swear. and then i didnt believe you. turned around and pretended i didnt hear but you continued and i found it hard not to trust you. yet now i find it so unbelievable because if i were, you wouldnt have left me to cry now ...would you? and now replaying those words in my head, it's because its so corny it sounds so artificial now somehow.
so many more things that keep repeating themselves in my head. so many more words, so many more actions. and everytime one runs by, the sting of your abandonment lashes across my beating heart and tears spring out like the day you sent me those last few messages. "im sorry, its all my fault. just forget about me, i'll never bother you again." or what i thought would have been your last messages. but no, they werent.
"you will always have a place with me but ..."
lies. they feel like such lies. they feel like words said just to try and save yourself.
i can' tell whats fiction from truth anymore. i can't tell who you are or who i am to you. or what i even was. and i wish i could hate you. but it's fucked up how after all those instant replays and insecurities left to seep into the cracks of your mind games, i dont. and instead i miss you like it was just yesterday you held me close.
Labels: confessions, emo, personal, reminders, stupidity, upset, wordy