Monday, September 28, 2009

Ghost of the Past

and i sit here listening to the songs you downloaded, stare at the screen that once belonged to you. i feel desolated.

all of a sudden, all your missing shirts are appearing in my cupboard. i turn and look at my bed and i see you lying there with that child like grin i had adored. the one i told everyone about when we played truth or dare in Otto's house.

i want to curl up in your arms. smell that familiar smell and cry to my hearts content. hide in my safe zone. in your posession, safe from harm.

you look happy now. more determined with life. dreams i know you will finally make an effort to reach. you lost yourself when you were with me. i never figured out which side of you had been the real you. and i guess that's what destroyed it all.

i remeber the image i watched on the mirror. and at this moment i want to run back in time. run to that memory where everything felt so right.

You flew like an angel to me
Then you fell and broke your wings
It was never meant to last
Your were just a ghost from the past

I thought you really could be real
That my heart was ready to bleed
When I walked through pain and fear
You would certainly disappear

You know that I love you, you know what I need
You know that I found you so tender so sweet
We walked through the darkness, we walked in the sun
We shared all our sorrows, we shared all the love

You said that you loved me, you said that you cared
So how could I know I had something to fear
I don't know where you are, I know that you're hurt
I should have been able to sense your alert

You came like a stranger to me
And you said you were for real
Though I do know where this would end
I was cold and I needed a friend

I turned on the light so you could see
I was stuck in some other dream
Still my eyes were crystal clear
You came closer and shattered my tears

You know that I love you, you know what I need
You know that I found you so tender so sweet
We walked through the darkness, we walked in the sun
We shared all our sorrows, we shared all the love

You said that you loved me, you said that you cared
So how could I know I had something to fear
I don't know where you are, I know that you're hurt
I should have been able to sense your alert

Go, How could you say you wanted to go
When my diamond were starting to grow
When you knew that I wanted you so
You left me alone

You know that I love you, you know what I need
You know that I found you so tender so sweet
We walked through the darkness, we walked in the sun
We shared all our sorrows, we shared all the love

You said that you loved me, you said that you cared
So how could I know I had something to fear
I don't know where you are, I know that you're hurt
I should have been able to sense your alert
- Ghost of the Past,Bang Gang

i miss you. i miss you so much right now.

and i hate myself for how i had hurt you so deep.

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-BabyGinz-