Saturday, September 26, 2009

Alcohol Overdose

the past 2 days have been met with downing of liquor in proportions rarely seen by many in terms of me. i rarely drink. i wonder why i said okay to everyone.this including strangers instead of my usual shake of the head. i even said okay to 2 inches of pure whisky. i do not like the taste of pure whisky but it tasted fine that day.

my shisha had been tasteless yesterday. apparently only i felt that way. we concluded it had been the guiness draught i had been asked to down. yes. i do not drink slowly. it makes me sick.

i had fun yesterday.

Black Eyed Peas were amazing and i met the cutest family who danced with me. Cute son, my age adorable smile. I forgot his name. Not like me to forget a persons name when i had spent a good deal of time chatting with. It's okay. We have mutual friends. I'm sure we'll meet again someday.

i finally had more than 4 hours of sleep today. but is it really considered? i woke up at 8 plus 9 with a start and the usual empty feeling of the heart. the exhaustion of the past weeks had been too much and i closed my eyes again surpressing the tears i have been keeping inside over the days in attempt to hold myself up. unknowingly i had fallen asleep and woken up 3 hours later. 7 hours of sleep. well done i tell myself. but i am tired now. tired and lazy. yet disgustingly restless as i have continuously been.

a friend of yours asked about you yesterday. i told him you were ignoring me. ignoring me by not replying my sms-es but he said that's normal for u. is it? i remember you used to reply every message even a random one like me wanting dim sum at 3 in the morning. you even replied when i said i missed you. long time story now huh?

the laugher on your friends face had been much apparent. "amused?" he said yes and i asked if he found it weird that it was me. his answered had been no. it's normal that it was me. but it was because it had been you that it became news to those around. why? why does everyone say the same thing. is there something i'm missing here?? if so, someone please tell me now.

i am tired.

so why do i still dig around for reasons to see you in dec this time around. the tickets are getting more and more expensive and where the hell am i going to stay now.

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-BabyGinz-