Life's Bittersweet Simplicities.

..Click Click Click..

So i finally got around to sorta finishing my layout. still a bit buggy here and there but im not free now la! later la ;p

Oh and if my layout is wonky on your browser its probabaly because your browsers old "=_= go update it.

..The Princess..

I am the very sin of life itself, living in a world and civilization i deem unworthy of the many now ruined perfection it was blessed with. The social anti-social i be but thats another part of me you will eventually see or hope to see.

I suffer from a bipolar disorder and can feel extreme happiness and sadness in the most disturbing of manner. Manic depressive some often call me or "emo girl" for short.

But who am i really?

That girl on the street you thought was hot or perhaps that girl you laughed at the day before.

What you see is your perception of me but what you know is something that even i find much a mystery.

Yes that is me in the picture and yes that is a pink cigarette i'm holding but no i'm not a smoker. But believe what you may for doubts will inevitably be existant.

..She Supports..

..Talk..

..Credits..

I'm Ginny; girly, emotional, rough and fundamentally retarded. Oh, mustn't forget extremely lazy and amazing at procrastination as well and err...well, clumsy (don't ask).

The surname's Yap and no my full name isn't really necessary in introductions. Arrogant, stubborn and well, what more might you ask?

Born 18th Feb 1990 though it looks like I was only alive since 2005 considering my innate obsession for all things cute and furry with the addition of my rather child like mentality equivalent to that of a 5 year old.

I'm sugar, spice and everything nice. Or so this is what I would like to think. POWERPUFF GIRLS ROCKS MY SOCKS!

Ginny is also short thus therefore becoming one of the main source of entertainment for those towering above her. Measuring at A MAXIUMUM of 160 cm, (note: maximum, therefore I'm actually really shorter than that.) she is very often rejected for jobs that require a minimum height requirement. Oh woe is me. LOOK, even her dog is taller than her U_U

With a shoe size of only 4 and when she's lucky 5, she doesn't really balance very well. Hur hur hur.

Loves food which would be the main contribution of my ever expanding waistline yet loves animals just as much. This therefore equates to a SAD Ginny trying very hard to cut down on food and attempt to slowly turn vegan. *pats self on back* Thank gawd for ice cream (NO MEAT!!).

Ginny is also highly obsessive compulsive and is rather anal about her food being mixed together. I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT STAND IT when my dishes are touching each other and mixing =(. I'm quite the oxymoron considering that I cannot stand a dirty and messy room yet I live in one. Ah, how oh so typical of me.

Also adores all things frilly and sexy, Ginny has a rather unhealthy obsession for bikinis, lingerie and costumes (ie. Nurse, French maid, sexy pirate). SO WE ALL KNOW WHAT TO GET HER FOR PRESENTS YA. However her bra size shall not be disclosed here and if you do intend to get her lingerie do get someone to check on her size first =p

Not into fashion as a whole but loves clothes just as much as any ordinary girl out there. Almost never wear skirts but I just can't seem to stop buying them @_@ I do however love dresses and will almost always be seen in them if my legs have been waxed (which is pretty rare) I have more dresses than bottoms *O* and a majority of them cannot be worn on normal days. Pfft.

This perpetually retarded princess is also inked with a fairy on the right side of her back. It's a naked emotional fairy if you can't already tell. WHAT? It's very me what!! Yah, I love fairies and all things magical. CANNOT AH NOW? Got her tattoo in 2007 at a friend's shop in Sunway called INKED. I REALLY REALLY WANT MORE if anybody would like to sponser me =3 ladidadida.

Ginny also realises that this description page is getting way too lengthy but while selecting pictures she accidentally picked too many and insist that she uses it all, so do bear with her please. How la can you say no to that innocent face of hers. HOHOHOHOHO.

Also goes by the name Cheekypixie and Babygin, this multi personality abomination of a female can be the most annoying bimbo you will ever meet yet at certain points in her life becomes the nerdiest geekiest creature alive. (though not necessarily smart) Ignoring the dumb, daft me, I LOVE LOVE LOVE BOOKS (another hint on what to give me lar hor) especially complicated twisted ones.

Also loves music and extremely into theather. Not that I can play any intrument but lets forget the loser side of me yea. Listens to almost anything but isn't that big a fan of heavy metal. More into mellow quiter songs and the occasional fast paced ones. If I were to tell you my favourite songs you would probably be reading for the next 5 hours.

Loves electronical games and is an avid Final Fantasy fan. Plays almost any kind of games except 3rd person shooter games and sports (extreme sports don't count) but her favourite being puzzles and RPGs. I love Earthworm Jim. DO YOU REMEMBER EARTHWORM JIM?? Is also still upset that she hasn't bought a Wii and an XBOX yet but she loves her PS3 (WHICH SHE WON YA) and her now semi abandoned PSP and the "stolen" Nintendo DS.

Okay, I am now officially tired of typing and self desciptions arent really my thing anyway. So if you need to contact me, e-mail me at sweetsimplicities[at]gmail.com.

Oh btw, did I mention?

IM AWESOME. Nuff said.

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

WHAT THE HELL IN FUCKS NAME IS WRONG WITH MY GOD DAMN FAMILY?!?!?! wtf .. I CANT FRIGGIN STAND IT ANYMORE.. I CANT I BLOODY CANT..

like wth.. im here online n i get yelled at to come down and eat dinner..n i dont and sit here longer n they send the maid to get me.. so yahla..i go down get my food start eating as usual.. n my dad suddenly comes home den shoot me

so since im already nearly done i continue..den my bro shoots me also ask y arent i waiting for the rest of the family.. LIKE MAHAI.. everyday also i eat at home ALONE.. *WHICH I WOULD GLADLY WISH FOR EVERYDAY.. CUZ ITS MUCH BETTER THAN BEING SURROUNDED BY THEM* then today u all the idiots who kept screaming for me to come down and eat.. and then scold me..

LIKE DAMN POINTLESS..cuz i just left my already nearly done food on the table waited for everyone till my rice got cold for like 10-15 mins.. FINALLY continue eating.. LESS DEN a MINUTE.. IM DONE AND OFF.. LIKE HOW FRIGGIN POINTLESS AND STUPID IS THAT..

ARGHHHhHHHH!!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE.. I CANT FRIGGIN HANDLE THIS ANYMORE

-BabyGinz-

*rolls eyes*

DADDYY DEAREST decided to have a talk with me.. and its funny.. i get everything he says i know everything and exactly what he means.. but mahai.. wth he wants.. as if im going to force myself to give respect for no damn reason... PLEASE la.. maybe AS HE INSIST..i just dont understand yet.. but i do.. i know.. but sometimes you just cant change your feelings...

AND GAWD DAMN HIM... start talking rubbish abt me and bad words.. mother.. bad words are just words.. i can make anything a bad word wad.. a bad word is a word used in anger or some crap like that onli wad.. chi bai..i can say FISH U LAR.. same meaning only lor.. so bloody sensitive for wad.. open ure damn minds a bit lar...

fucking irritating okay..he talk to me so nicely for like an hour..i felt nothing... NOT A THING... i just either ignored him..answered him back whatever he said till he was at a lost for words OR STARE AT HIM till he looked away... huhuhuhu...

i know im a bad daughter.. but i cant help it.. i didnt do anything wrong and they always treat like i do things that r stupid n accuse me of like smoking drugs n rubbish like that then use all those rubbish to restrict me..den FINE LAR... i also move furthur away..and CONGRATULATIONS.. U DID IT!! i no longer feel or want to have anything to do with this family =] cheers

-BabyGinz-

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

I HATE MY EFFING PARENTS..

I HATE THEIR EFFING GUTS

NO.. i will not regret my words... because i have never felt sympathy for them in my life

i watch my father hit my mother n stood there without a hint of sadness... i watched as if watching a cat walk by..

i watched my mother cry in front of me.. and i rolled my eyes at the very sight of it..

i watch her fall flat on the ground in the car park and break her toenails.. n even break her glasses..i stood there and burst out laughing...

i look at my father sick.. and i can't help but feel happy cuz GOOD.. he can't fucking make my life even crappier than it is...

i take money from their wallets.. in fact i steal money from their wallets.. without the slightest hint of regret or guilt...

i feel nothing for them... as i have for more than 4 years...i buy them presents.. only because i have too and not because i want to...

I HATE IT WHEN THEY TOUCH ME...

i hate it when they are even a few inches next to me

i get annoyed when i see them...

honestly sometimes i wonder.. do i really belong in this family? i am the blacksheep.. i look nothing like them... i have nothing in common with the rest of my family.. I DONT EVEN SEEM LIKE A PROPER CHINESE... like whats up with that..?? was i adopted maybe?? or is my father someone else?

why dont i belong? why dont i fit it?? why do i hate being near them.. why do i want to run away so badly..

i just can't take it anymore... just take me away...away from the people who are meant to be closest to me.. for they bring nothing but pain..hurt..frustration and sadness...

-BabyGinz-

Monday, May 29, 2006

IAN LOW FUCK YI...

ITS GREAT TO KNOW HOW *loved* I WAS.. n its great to know how *cherished* I WAS... AND OH YEAH~~ ITS ALL MY FUCKING FAULT!!

IM SORRY I LIED TO U

IM SORRY I CHEATED ON U

IM SORRY I SLAPPED U

IM SORRY I PUSHED U ON THE FLOOR

IM SORRY I TIED A BELT AROUND URE NECK AND TRIED TO SUFFOCATE U

IM SORRY I PUSHED URE HEAD AGAINST THE MIRROR AND NEARLY SHATTERED IT

IM SORRY I USED YOUR MONEY LIKE WATER

IM SORRY I SCOLDED U WHEN I WAS THE 1 LYING JUST SO THAT MY LIE WOULD SEEM MORE REAL

IM SORRY FOR ALWAYS MAKING U SAD AND CRY

IM SORRY FOR ALWAYS NEGLECTING AND ABUSING U...

IM SORRY I NEVER STOOD UP FOR U

IM SORRY I WATCHED U CUT YOURSELF

IM SORRY I CONSTANTLY DEMANDED U COME SEE ME IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT DEMANDING U SNEAK OUT OF THE HOUSE AND TAKE A CAB AND WHEN U DIDNT I GOT ANGRY AT U

IM SORRY I CONSTANTLY MADE EMPTY PROMISES

IM SORRY I EVEN MADE CONTRACTS WITH U AND THEN PRETENDED THEY NEVER EXISTED

IM SORRY I THREW YOUR CAMERA TILL IT BROKE AND THEN DENIED THAT I EVEN TOUCHED IT JUST BECAUSE I HAD NO MONEY AND U REFUSED TO GIVE ME SOME

IM SORRY I THREW YOUR HANDPHONE ON THE FLOOR

IM SORRY I CAME TO YOUR HOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WITH A BIG GROUP OF PPL AND STARTED HORNING AND MAKING YOUR PARENTS COME OUT

IM SORRY I ALWAYS MADE PLANS WITH U BUT LEFT U ALONE TO BE WITH MY FRIENDS

IM SORRY I SLAPPED YOU FOR ANOTHER GUY

IM SORRY I LIED ABOUT HOW I LOVED YOU..NEEDED YOU AND HOW I WANTED TO CHANGE FOR U

IM SORRY FOR RESTRICTING THE WAY YOU DRESSED

IM SORRY FOR NOT LETTING YOU GO OUT WITH OLD FRIENDS THAT U HAVENT SEEN IN AGES OR PRETENDING THAT I WAS FINE AND WHEN I DID GO OUT AFTER YOUR OKAY YOU SCREAMED ENDLESS AMOUNTS OF INSULTS AT ME SAYING I DINDT RESPECT YOU AND I DIDNT GIVE A DAMN ABOUT U

IM SORRY I WENT INTO YOUR MSN PRETENDED TO BE YOU AND FUCKED EVERY GUY..OPPS..I MEAN GIRL ON YOUR LIST AND NEVER EVEN APOLOGISED FOR IT

IM SORRY I TOOK YOUR PHONE AND CONSTANTLY MISSED CALLED THE GUYS.. EH .. I MEAN GIRLLLSSS WHO U DIDNT WANT TO TALK TO

IM SORRY I DELETED OTHER GUYS..EH..*hmm..i wonder why i keep typing guys ah* I MEAN GIRLS NUMBERS FROM YOUR HANDPHONE

IM SORRY I ALWAYS GO OUT WITH YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS AND I GO THROUGH TANTRUMS DEMANDING TO GO HOME EVERY SINGLE TIME WITHOUT EVEN BEARING WITH IT FOR 10 MINUTES UNLESS WE"re WATCHING A MOVIE

IM SORRY I ALWAYS DEMAND YOU COME TO MY HSE INSTEAD OF ME GOING TO YOURS

MOST OF ALL.. IM SORRY FOR TREATING U LIKE A DOG.... *kononnya lah...*

IM OH SO VERY SORRY!!! *smirks*

THANKS FOR A FUCKING GREAT 2 YEARS OF *love* AND IM SOOO FUCKING SORRY IF IVE ALWAYS TAKEN U FOR GRANTED AND USED U FOR MY OWN BENEFITS!! HONEST I AM

-BabyGinz-

Sunday, May 28, 2006

ive never said i hated u.. ive never wished u were dead.. ive never really gave a damn abt u.. at least.. never until today..

honestly.. i wished u were dead...

u have brought nothing to this family.. but agony n pain..so yeah u brought me into this life.. but what have u ever given me.. u took in a mistress.. u gave her all ure money.. u hit my mother.. u even tried to hit me... u abuse my pets.. the only babies that kept me sane.. u even made my baby milo go limp.. thank god he made it.. and its amazing he even forgave you for that... u threw him in the rain after u hit him he cried..n was bleeding.. and when i tried to get him.. u threatened to do the same to me... u killed so many animals.. u killed half of my pets..

u barely gave me enough money.. u called me stupid..u called me trash.. i always got pretty good results.. i have never done anything really bad.. u accused me of rubbish.. and called my friends spoiled..stupid..irresponsible and arrogant. what abt u.. u fucking jack ass...

so what if ure company's going bankrupt... that aint really my fault.. it's ure arrogance.. stupidity and ure payment for all the pain u've caused... i never really gave a damn.. i still treated u like my dad... true i didnt really show it.. but i never showed u the least signs of disrespect...

i didnt give a damn when u had another family... u deny it exist... not that ive ever asked... for i respected ure choice.. i know being with her isnt the easist of task.. i whined not i said nothing.. i just smiled and greeted u when u came back...

u never really gave a damn... so why the hell do u want to act like u care.. because u know what.. I FUCKING HATE URE FUCKING GUTS.. not of what u did in ure past... but the fact u think im trash.. n the fact u think im so fucking stupid.. that i'll end up being some roadside prostiture or some crap like that..

u dont give me respect...u dont even give me money.. not for books.. not for food..yeah true.. once in a while when i went on holiday u would give me money.. but what about other times.. u critisize everything i do.. FUNNY.. i seem to be doing way better than u..

u make decisions without asking me.. U FUCKING COMPLAIN u have no money.. and u decide to take out 1 k..to send me on a fucking 4 day seminar.. where im not allowed to come back... without even asking my consent..WTF R U THINKING..... HOW OLD DO U THINK I AM...at least ask me... dont just bloody do things thinking that its the best...

u fucking banned me from going to my friends hse.. u fucking dont let me stay in their houses... WITH THE REASON IM 16 NOW... ure so easy to be taken advantage off.. LIKE WTF... oh yeah..my freinds of more then 5 years r suddenly going to go crazy n raped n murder me now..

the older i get the more u treat me like a child... GROW UP... im not your little princess ... NEVER WAS.. NEVER WILL BE.. and NEVER WANT TO BE....

just give me my fucking life back....

-BabyGinz-

Saturday, May 27, 2006

... is it really funny... 1st u tell me i ignore u.. i dont give a damn about u.. i don't even call u or look for u... but.. funny.. it's you who doesnt do that.. and when i do make it a point to call. it's you who refuses to answer the phone.. it's u who tells everyone u dont want to have anything to do with me.. is this fun?? do u like doing this... funny.. i can't seem to see the humour or the pleasures of this simple trickery...

-BabyGinz-

Friday, May 26, 2006

CLICK HERE and OPEN MY PIC to vote for me.. hahhaha.. if u open other pics means ure voting for them.. yeah..unfortunately that's how it works.. my pic is the pic of me called angel with an attitude... huhuhu.. actually i think it's the only girl pic there.. PASS THE WORD AROUND... please n thank u

-BabyGinz-

..i don't know what is it with u.. why do u always do this to me? why am i writing this? i know u dont even bother reading my blog. u read everyone elses but mine. why. i dont know. maybe cause i mean nothing to u.

why is it you still want to hurt me even though we're not together? we're been single for nearly a month now. why can't you leave my heart alone to heal. why? why do u take a knife and slowly peel each layer by layer.. or stab into it each time the hole u created tries to heal.. why? why hurt me. havent u had enough? HAVENT I HAD ENOUGH?....

even know u tell me lies.. u give me empty promises.. and each time i repeat your words.. u deny it and start screaming and hurling insults at me..as if i were a dog.. or a toy.. u said i treat you like a dog.. but my dogs r happy dogs.. i wasnt aware a sad dog was given everything. taken care of by his owner when he's sick. given new toys every week. fed with good food. played with everyday. true. i put u in a cage when u arent around me. but why. isnt it because u constantly lie to me. u constantly cheat on me. isnt it because each time u look for them. u come back baring your teeth at me? ....

what about me. i am your dog too. except. i am neglected. ignored. taken out to play once in a while. when im not. and i act pityful and look for your attention. u take a stick. u scream at me. u hit me.. u leave me with nothing but tears. a broken heart. and an undying loneliness and sadness. why is it wrong for me to bare my teeth at your friends. who stand outside my cage. laughing at me. poking at me with that stick. and taking u away from me? those who make u take that stick and hit me.

maybe it's my fault. maybe it's cuz i forgive u every time. but what do u expect from me. i love you.

-BabyGinz-

Thursday, May 25, 2006

sometimes... u just can't help missing a person at the strangest of times.......

-BabyGinz-

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

ARghHHhhhHHHHH......!!!!!!!! im soo fucking hurttt!! I DISCOVERED I MISSED THE FUCKING SEVENTEEN COVER GIRL SEARCH AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! arghhHHHHhhHHhH

and whats worst i had a fucking migrain for abt 24 hours so i didnt go to school today..AND I MISSED MY BIP AND PHYSICS PEKA!! ARGhHhhHHh

oh well.. today hsio hua very stupid.. to know more.. read her blog www.xanga.com/pinkberriez ...hahaha..but she didnt blog about 1 thing!! toodaayy righhtt.. she wanted to smokeee..we all so good girl..me n hsin.. so we got no lighter for her..so right she went up t thsi bunch of guys in the car and asked for lighter! HAHAHA.>AND DAMN FUNNY!! bcuz she looked like she was going to go up to them and say.. HEy.. will you be my bf?? WHICH IRONICALLY...the guy asked her.. wei.. can we be friends.. what your name ah... AHHAHAHAHA.. damn funny.. then she ignore then she walked back to us..

BUT THE BEST PART IS.. her cig went off.. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.. SO SHE HAD TO GO BACK AND ASK FROM THEM AGAIN!!!! hahahahaha..damn funny then they dunno said wad to her again..but i 4got di >=P .. after that they shouted sumtin TAKE CARE WOR!! WALK CAREFULLY WOR>. blah blah blah....

anyway today i played with colour contacts.. MWuahahAHA..n i cant resist lar..im gonna buy 2 pairs.. if i can decide which colours i want T_T

-BabyGinz-

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

....in loving memory of my baby sugar who passed away today..at what time.. unknown. cause of death. diahhrea. ................................... DAMN HURT LOR MAHAI..morrow my fren who's a vet coming and he pass away today........ IM SO HEARTBROKEN.. URGh!HhH!H!HH!

poor baby.. rest in peace okay... i love u.. take cares...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

btw... i hate the no 1/3 .... T_T.. mahai..this no make me fail add maths.... u wanna hear wads ironic.. i got 43... 2 questions.. 1 is 5/15.. n i ended up putting 3 there cuz i was so blur when i kecilkan.. den another 1.. dunno wad wad.. but the answer is 1/3 also wan lar..n i put 1... LOOK!! ONE 1 AND ONE 3!!!!! MAHAIIIIIIIII!! AND BECAUSE OF THIS..I COULDNT PASS ADDMATHS!! OMFGGG

-BabyGinz-

Monday, May 22, 2006

OMG.. IM SO FUCKING HURT.. I SAW MY PHYSICS AND MATHS.. LIKE MOTHER FUCKER.. OMG... i think im going to commit suicide..
WHICH IDIOT reads a termometer wrongly for example.. *okay..it was a micrometer screw gauge* but im telling it in terms of a termometer so u get my point... WHICH IDIOT WRITES THE WRONG QUESTionS>.?!?! WHICH IDIOT USES A CALCULATOR N GETS THE WRONG ANSWERS ?!?! WHICH IDIOT TOTALLY MISSES OUT READING IMPORTANT WORDS LIKE EFFECTS.. IN THE FRIGGIN ANSWERS.. N WHCIH IDIOT.. DOES A QUESTION HALFWAY..LIKE substituion.. finds x or y.. N TOTALLY 4GETS ABT THE OTHER UNKNOWN........................................................

...............

AND SO ...that idiot.. would be.. ME...................

..........i actually lost like more den 30-40++ marks.... on mistakes such as so and so.. for my maths n physics papers combined..................... *SOMEONE JUST KILL ME*

-BabyGinz-

i must say...what an *ish* day i had today.. went all the way to sri hartamas this morning to look for that damn company called Legendary Arts..at 1st wah.. damn happy on the way to sri hartamas..cuz my blurness i kept telling all the opposite directions to ian.. and LUCKY shit.. because of my bluuurrrnnesss...we took all the roads that TOTALLY AVOIDED ALL THE JAMS!! so like wahh!! GREAT!! luck is on my side!! sooo much more time to look for that place... UNFORTUNATELY.............. COULD NOT FIND IT.. so i tried calling 103 operator directory..n they didn't have such a number either.. so went and ask ppl.. and everyone stared at me like i was an alien and i was talking in gibberish or something.. ISH ISH... SO in the end.. give up..went back..

suppose to go school..den was thinking thinking in the end to tired n blur decided go home.. WHICH IS LUCKY!! cause i wanted to go school hand up my bio peka only.. hahaha.. BUT.... SHE DIDNT COME!! MWhAhHAhAhHAHAa...

and now here i am..looking blur as usual...

anyway.. anybody know any jobs i can do.. for like 2-3 day events.. those promoter girls or something..in grave need of cash T_T

....crap.. liz just messaged me... pn jamaliah just came.. "=_= OH GREAT.. i am sososoosososososos SCREWEEEDD!!

-BabyGinz-

Saturday, May 20, 2006

hmmmm..went to the zoo today........finally after 11 yrs? i had fun.. but had to go home early T_T so sad..... malas to talk abt it.. not in a very good mood..

just came back from Grease the musical. had free front row seats.. center... it wasnt THAT good. was just ok for me.. =S ... i mena their singing was amazing n stuff.. but i dunno lar.. dont have that ommPphhH!.. i liked STOMP a lot more ... but i wanna go carrtoooniiivallll.. WHY NOBODY WANNA GO WITH ME?!??! I KNOW IM CHILDISHHH!! BUT HOW CAN U NOT WAN TO GO WATCHHHHHH!!! ISH ISHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

SOMEONE.. GO WITH ME.. *cries in agony*

-BabyGinz-

Thursday, May 18, 2006

MAHHAIII!! AMERICA!! U ALL STUPID KAH!?!??! wth man!!! ELLIOT's VOICE SO SUPER DUPER LUM!! he sooo cute summoh!! HOW CAN U ALL PUT TAYLOR IN THE FINALS!??!?! MAH CHOW HAIii!!! he's a farking dickhead lor!!!! IRRITATING.. n BAD VOICE!! seriously lor..he got stage presence only..but his stage presence is farking retarded!!!!

ELLIOT DESERVES TO BE IN THE FINALS SOOOOO MUCHHHH MOOOREEEEE!!! *ARGHHH*

-BabyGinz-

ISHHHHHHH!! my maths!! OMG!! i tot will get at least 80 MINIMUM lor.. cuz i like know how to do most of it.. budden ia sk teacher she said 70++ .. WHICH MEANS IT MIGHT b a B ALSO?!?! LIKE WTH!! i got that blur or not orh?!?!?!?! or mebbe she meant 70++ 4 paper 2.. *prays hard* .. ARGHH!! BUT STILL!!! DAMN TERUK LOR MY MARKS!!!!!!luckily my chemistry get 90? is it 90?? aihya.. 85-90 la..huhuhu

watched da vinci code today..n i must say..i was gravely dissapointed T_T.. it just wansnt up to expectations..like so many interesting parts of the book taken out!! ISHHH!! shouldnt have read the book!!! HAIH

nothing much to blog about actually...lazy.. T_T.. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

-BabyGinz-

Monday, May 15, 2006

OMMMG!!! I CANT BELIEVE IT!! I REALLY ACTUALLY FAILED ADDMATHS!! hahaha.. tis soo fucking stupid!! i left like half the paper blank..and wanna hear the ironic part.. those were the easiest questions in the paper.. AND.. they were from my fav chapter..

i used to have composite function but i did nearly all..and i loved log n indices.. AND I DID NONE!! WTH!!! *SOMEONE KILL ME!!* my 1st fail in 11 yrs.. OMG..my parents r going to chop me into a million pieces and feed me to the fishes!!! OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG......................

-BabyGinz-

Sunday, May 14, 2006

mmfftt.. next week.. or technically this week.. i have add maths.. bio...physics.. *dreaded physics* n MANDARIN *dear gawd... pls at least let me pass* .... IM SO SCREWED! WOOHOOO!!! n my attempt to spend the weekend studying ended up as a eat n sleep fest!! n playing with my adorably stupid bunnies!! *enuff said. im doomeeeddddd*

blardy hell.. they right.. their cage at the bottom is grill wan..so they pee or shit also it wont dirty them.. BUT NOOO LORR.. they ark.. must stick their lil privys outside the cage n pee all over the floor outside wan!! must clean up so often!! ish ishhh~!!! WHERE GOT SUCH THING WAN!! trying to tell me something is it T_T but i wuv them anyways <3 <3 <3 nyek nyeks ;p

i should b at least trying to do some addmaths now..b4 going fer dinner.. bcuz we all know im gonna come back n tell u how sleepy i am n collapse on the bed u_u butt noooooo.. here i am.. on9.. AGAIN... greaaattt.. WILL SOME1 TEACH ME TO STOP PROCRASINATING LIKE THAT??! its not funny anymore!!!

well..yesterday was interesting..i got conned by ian *no were not together* n had dinner with him..and it turned out i ended up going dinner with his family... no big deal.. except... we were celebrating... mother's day.. for the evil grandmother.. T_T.......... andrea asked me beforehand what was i doing here but i thought she was referring to the fact im here again for the 3rd time in a row when im not with her brother.. but it was bcuz we were going to celebrate mother's day for the evil grandmother.. *bangs head on wall* ... gosh.. im hungry... =S...

i shall go trudge down n see if i can manage to squeeze a few addmaths questions into my unaccepting brain b4 i go fer dinner in 15 mins XD.. wish me luck! mwahhahahaha

-BabyGinz-

Saturday, May 13, 2006

huahauhaua.. as promised... PICTURES OF MY BUNNY!!! hahaha.. ok la.. so got 2 pics onli.. go away la..i got no cam okay.. cheh... n a very weird picture of my chicken chop.. HUHUHUHUHU

look.. coincidently.. my chicken chop even resembles a BUNNY!!! HUHUHUHU..scary aint it..

SUGAR n SPICE... n everything nice *me* hHAHAHHAHA

boy meets girl.. hahaha.. guess which is which

-BabyGinz-

Friday, May 12, 2006

sorry for the lack of update and i must apologise to eric as well..ehehhee.. I LINKED THE WRONG PIC ALSO!!1 hahaha.. ok.. HERE'S the correct 1 ..hahahaha..gome gome!!!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

AND.. i am soo friggin annoyed.. like wth... im doing this cambridge thingie.. and we have writing.. and they have a 120-180 word limit.. mine onli like 130 words.. AND MS MANO INSIST I WENT OVER THE LIMIT.. LIKE WTH... whats even more fucked up is.. i got 2 out of 5.. WHICH IS THE LOWST IN THE WHOLE FRIGGIN BUNCH OF PPL TAKING THIS EXAM.. she was like.. everyone got at least 3 bands.. which is the average... and im sure everyone has got 3 bands minimum.. and i got 2 bands for BOTH ESSAYS?? like wth?? and with insistance that i went over the limit as well/!?!?!

I KNOW LAR my english standard not very terror only.. but i know my essays r okay wan lor.. at least for a typical malaysian standard.. I KNOW U HATE ME bcuz of sum dumbass things in the past which i have no recollection of well i do but quite blurry at this moment cuz if i remember correctly.. they WERE ITTY BITTY POINTLESS THINGS... BUT NO NEED TO CONDEMN ME LIKE THIS WAN MAR?!?!?!? niamaaaa....

and then right got grammar thing.. den i finished 1st.. i was quite sure she was going to say sumtin to me along the liens of.. so fast? did u do it properly ..check properly.. or sum rubbish like that like she usually does..den keegan finishes like a split second after me and she goes!! OH!! ure done already!! u should have join cae den! which is a higher level of exams.. hahaha.. which encik iskhandar banned all form 4's from taking.. huhuhu..

btw! i bought rabbits.and they r just so friggin cute i have decided to post their pictures in my blog as well.. WHICH IS A RARE RARE SIGHT.. cuz i need a lot of effort to post pics in my blog wan u_u aihh aihhh... but in the next post..cuz i onli paid the deposit so far.. HAHAHAHAHAH

-BabyGinz-

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

*i realised that i can't write like i used to anymore...it seems like my writing has become emotionless but i just can't seem to find the right words or the right way to express myself... but believe me... this post took a lot of effort out of me.. not for the reason i had to figure out how to write it.. but for the reason.. it hurts when i write it...so forgive me if i sound like an emotionless void or my writing lacks feelings...but i tried...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

...*i hear your voice, on the line.........click*

hello?

do u want banana pie?

i want the starbucks one.

wah. no money lor!!

den nvm lar.

if no banana pie leh?

den nvm ler.

dont want anything else?

nope.

*click*

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*ding dong*

*sits on toilet bowl and shits*

why u always come home also shit wan???!!

where got? maybe once a week only lor.

*sits on the bed*

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

*comes out of toilets*

*click click click click*

*pick up hp*

*snatches hp back*

NOTHING TO SEE LAR!!

DEN?! nothing why so scared for what!?!

because got nothing to see. you wanna see for what??

i like ark!! kenot meh!!

*hands over hp*

*browses and finds the reason why he was so afraid. he forgot to delete the message he sent her*

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

come here la. *pats bed*

*lies down*

*hugs*

why are you here?

because i wanted to see you.

but you messaged her. why dont u go out with her.

because i wanted to see you.

you're lying. she didn't reply you only.

even if she did. yum cha also later lar.

dont talk so much lar. come here.

*hugs*

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

actually how can u stay here and hug me knowing u just messaged her before you came?

*silence*

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

i finally gave in and laid there while he hugged me but i refused to look at him... knowing there was something i had to do. i kept pushing him away. not forcefully but in a soft gentle manner and he ignored me and hugged me harder.

i made excuses. like showing him something on the computer. and he reluctantly agreed. after just browsing for about 5 minutes. he pulled me back onto the bed and hugged me. this time tighter still and turned me around to face him. i turned away. saying that it was hot.

i felt something heavy on my heart and tears sprung in my eyes but i held my ground. for the first time in nearly 2 yrs i didn't cave for i knew it had to be done.

why are you here?really? seriously?

U DONT WANT ME HERE IS IT?! DEN I LEAVE LAR!!

i just don't know why you're here.

THANKS!

*silence*

you want to break up so badly is it. DEN FINE LAR! U LIKE LAR.

i dont. it's you who wants it.

NO LOR! ITS YOUR DECISION LOR.

*silence*

*more silence*

*takes key and returns it*

this is mine?

its your house key. i made it last time. but you can have it back.

*takes key in silence*

i turned around refusing to look at him and burst into silent tears as he walked out my room. i could hear his footsteps echoing outside my room. i stood up and walked to my window crying and opened the door for him with my remote. i stood there watching waiting for him to walk out but he took longer than i had expected. i half turned expecting to see him by my door but it was just me wishing he would turn back and at least try to change my mind.

he finally walked out and more hot tears flowed silently down my face. i wanted to shout. scream. tell him i loved him and i didn't mean it. but nothing came out. nothing but a squeak and fresh tears.

i watched helplessly and he walked out my front gate and into his car. without even a 2nd glace back and looked at his face with a fresh feeling of regret but no.i loved him and this had to be done. i have to give him my last sacrifice. him.

he drove out my driveway and halfway past my house he let out a honk. i looked the opposite side expecting to see a car or something. to see what he was honking at and realised. his last honk. it was meant for me...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

baby look. its past midnight which means its the 10th of may. its the 1 yr anniversary of the day we finally realised just how much in love we really were.. =) .. do u remember? well. i do. and i will always remember..

nothings changed. i still love you as much as i did then. i miss you. i really do. but there's nothing else i can do. i've tried. i've tried my best to hold on. but it requires sacrifice. and i have given you everything. and now. im left with no choice. but to give you my last and final sacrifice. you.

im sorry and i love you.

-BabyGinz-

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

i finally did it.. i made a clean break up...

no..i dont want to talk abt it... no.. we didnt have a fight.. well at least we didnt break up because of the fight...

no.. im not ok.. but yet.. im fine... T_T..

-BabyGinz-

Monday, May 08, 2006

well.... this is interesting.. this week i found 2 ppl who have the same things as me... 1.. from kevinhan.net ... 1 of his models.. HAS THE SAME WHITE BIKINI AS ME..n i was bored so i desided to browse jasmine the penguin's page AND i discovered... SHE HAS THE SAME DRESS AS ME!!! LOOK AT THIS PIC!!!

-BabyGinz-

hmmm..i need to buy a new camera since my old 1 has been thoroughly destroyed... and i cant decide between THIS olympus or THIS canon. the olympus is super afforadable.. canon..i have no idea.. i think abt 1.5k ... but the canon the screen BIG ORH!!!! HELPPP MEEEEE

-BabyGinz-

gawd dammit.. im fuckinf tired n exhausted n i cant fucking fall asleep.. like wth? im friggin doomed morrow if i dont get my nap now... URGHHHH!!!!!

all my post now have been moody biased rants.. T_T... well fuck it...

-BabyGinz-

Sunday, May 07, 2006

im sad..moody.. frustrated....

i dont feel like studying.. i dont feel like doing anything...

great.. 3rd yr in a row this has happened.. yeap.. approximately the same time too.. great isnt it...

here i am getting ready to fail sejarah n maybe even bm if im too moody morrow...

-BabyGinz-

fuck.. its 3 am.. n im here.. woke up at 2.. fuck!!!!!!.. i need to sleep!! i havent studied anything at all!!! shits.. friday went to watch movie. today went to disturb that fucker. tot ok di.. budden he fucking gone mad or something and claims hes still angry at me n shoot me in the evening when i call n ask what he's doing.. after disturbing him..went dentist.. I HATE DENTIST~~ ARGH!! i think im happier if i went n got dentures TT,, den went home bathe went out again with some relatives this time.. den come home..straightaway sleep

THIS IS NOT GOOD!! HOW MORROW!! OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG... im gonna screw up so badly in my first exam!!! IM FOLLOWING IANS FOOTSTEPS!! OMMGG!! im gonna screw up form 4 n 5!! HOORAY FOR ME...

shit..im high yet not high.. some1 just shoot me TT

-BabyGinz-

Thursday, May 04, 2006

i read this on a friend's bf's sister's blog and i juz found this interesting.. @_@

Did you know that originally fairy tales were folk lore not meant for the ears of children? Most of them sounded like horror stories when I read them and I think almost all incorporated elements of violence, sexuality and murder.Very scary leh! This is better than reading Russell Lee's SIngapore Ghost Stories.Actually some of them I already read the real un-Disney versions when I was younger but I forgot them. Come to think of it, I don't know why I didn't feel as disturbed then as I do now. Some more children's books sure got illustrations wan.

Let me give you an example.In Cinderella, when the evil stepsisters are trying on the glass slipper, it obviously doesn't fit right. The stepmother hands them a knife and tells them to cut off first their toes then the heels to fit, assuring them that they won't need to walk anymore once they are Queen. Pukimak fucking grotesque right!! Of course the prince notices the blood seeping out of the glass shoe and tell them to fuck off la. *hand motion*

Fast forward to the prince and Cinderella's wedding. Sitting there at the wedding, the evil stepsisters' eyes are pecked out by Cinderella's pet doves and they go blind as punishment for being such bitches to her.

Speaking of going blind, let's talk about Rapunzel now. You know how the prince climbs up her hair to see her right? And then the witch finds out about it BECAUSE RAPUNZEL FUCKING WENT AND TOLD HER, THAT IDIOT. She cuts off Rapunzel's long (blond?) hair and holds it out of the window for the prince the next time he comes.

The prince gets so scared by the witch (=.=) that he falls from the tower and lands in thorns, which blind him (do we sense a pattern here?) and Rapunzel is banished to the desert.There, Rapunzel gives birth to twins - a boy and a girl - and lives with them there. =.= Hor! Sex before marriage

!The prince, who's been walking around blind the whole time, meets her in the desert. Rapunzel recognises him and bursts into tears, which kena the prince's eyes somehow and he gets back his sight and they live happily ever after.

Next, Beauty and the Beast.Don't know much about it other than that some people say that the reason Beauty didn't want to leave her father and get married (to Gaston?) was because there was supposed to be some incestuous relationship between her and her father. =.=" When she finally falls in love with the Beast, she like grows up and stops the incest. Or something.

One article I read also mentioned that Sleeping Beauty was being raped by her father also. ><" Can't remember the details.Don't quote me, by that time my eyes were blurring already. You want you go google it yourself.

Which brings me to Snow White.I didn't read it anywhere, but Angela says she remembers reading that the reason why the evil queen hated Snow White so much wasn't because she was hotter than her, but because she was also having an incestuous relationship with her father. What's wrong with last time people?! Stories like this now sure get banned left and right and the writers jailed in Malaysia because haram wan.

Anyway, in the original Brothers Grimm tale, the queen tells the hunter to kill SW in the forest and bring back her heart and liver to show she's dead. Of course the hunter feel kesian for her and kills a deer instead. He brings back the deer organs and the queen has it salted and eats it. =.=Later when she finds out SW is still alive, she tries on 3 attempts to kill Snow White.

First she pretends to be a peddlar and offers Snow White some pretty laces to lace up her bodice. She laces Snow White up too tight, she suffocates and faints. But the 7 dwarfs manage to save her when they come back, much to the queen's annoyance.Next, the queen tries to sell Snow White a poisoned comb. Again Snow White kena bluffed and let her stick the comb into her head. She collapses. But the queen is foiled again when the dwarfs come back and save her.Finally the queen gets smart and gives Snow White the poisoned apple and she collapses.(Let me just say that of all the Disney princesses, I hated Snow White with a passion and now i realise it's justified because she is a total moron - terpedaya a whopping 3 times and all by an old lady disguise)Okay fastforward again to after the prince gives SW the kiss of true love and to their wedding day.The evil queen is invited and before that she checks with her magic mirror who is the hottest again la.

And the mirror tells her that the young queen is prettier than her. The queen is damn not satisfied/bo kam wan/mm kam yuen and goes to the wedding to find out who is that. At the wedding, people find out that the queen was responsible for the attempted murder of SW. As punishment, a pair of iron shoes is heated until red-hot and membara for her. She is forced to put them on and dance until she dies. = =

OK lastly the Little Mermaid of which the Disney version was a total deviation from. (Incidentally, the Little Mermaid used to be Brother Ooi's favorite movie. We used to fight over whether we were going to watch Little Mermaid or the Sound of Music everyday.)When LM (her name is not Ariel) asks the Sea Witch for help to turn human, the Sea Witch actually cuts off her tongue, and not just takes her voice. She receives a potion that will give her legs, but whenever she walks, she'll feel like she's walking on knives.

She meets the prince and the prince likes to see her dance so she dances for him even tho it's so damn painful ><"The prince loves her but only as a child.Then the prince fucking goes and marries this other princess from another kingdom!LM's sisters come and find her and give her a knife and tell her if she kills the prince, she'll turn back into a mermaid and can come home.(Forgot to say, if she failed to marry the prince, she was supposed to turn into sea foam, not the germs in the Disney movie)

But LM's heart is too soft and she can't do it. So she turns into seafoam. No wait, suddenly she feels herself becoming lighter and she becomes some air spirit etc etc then I lazy to type already you go Wikipedia it.My point is, fairytale characters are really stupid, don't learn from past mistakes and can't do anything to help themselves let alone save someone else.And olden times people must have been damn scary.Okay my elbow hurts from typing too much already.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

hahaha...now i noe why i used to like little mermaid so much di. ive got a relationship like her "=_=..... farked up lover.. aih aih aih...

cruds..my connection is damn laggy 2day.. "=_= ...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

anyway i had a fucked up day today thanks to who else but dearest ian... macibai... today i kena fark bcuz that bastard 2.40 pm msg me say go watch movie. den i msg back say ok. i meet him there he go buy ticket 1st. den he reply back and said huh.? i come fetch u le. call u when i come. den i feel so uncertain cuz i dun wanna kena tiao again cuz on monday also same thing happen i called him lor at abt 2.50-3.00. talk talk talk. teacher staring geram at me liao. and then bastard claims he never said he come fetch me and ask me go back myself...

OK..NVM... budden i ask him.. weh. who's car u got. den he tell me his dad... so i ask him lar.. huh? den who's going to fetch andrea? den his answer... *silence* don't know wor .. ( later after fetching me.screaming at me and nearly slapping me with andrea in the backseat and him getting out of the car asking me to drive telling me how fucked up i am n yahde yahde yahde. i ask him again. so if not u fetch andrea who fetch ah. ure dad meh? U TOOK HIS CAR LOR. he can cleverly answer me my grandmother lar. den i ask so why just now i ask dont say. then HE CLAIMS.. ITS BCUZ HE ASK ME GO BACK MYSELF I DONT WANT? NIAMA. FUCKING CIBAI.fucker. earlier ask him ownself dunno. den ownself say fetch me den all the rubbish)

NVM ALSO. CUZ IM USED TO IT. DEN THE FUCKER WHAT ELSE. motherfucker. HE FUCKING DARE TO SAY DAMN RUSH. MACIBAI... u ownself at 2.50 say come fetch me. den u noe i end school at 3.40 n movie starts at 4.15. then 3 o clock drive over lar. niama. instead what. say go n eat. so i ask lar.. huh? why now only go eat lunch why don't eat earlier? HIS ANSWER. because i thought i got class at 3. so i wanna tahan until after class lor. den i ask then if like that what time class end. he said 5. then. after 5 onli eat right? he said yah. ..........."=_= NIAMA. OK LAR. if after 5 onli eat. den why now kenot?? mother fucker. say already then claim never say. say wanna fetch den later say dun wanna fetch . why?? BECAUSE LAZY.. go n DIE LAR. so because fetch me must eat at 3 sumtin lar. if got class den can go long kai for abt 1-2 hours den go class then onli eat lar? WTF IS THIS???

FUCKING 7 WAI LOR.. bloody fuck shit.. look..im even talking and swearing like him now.. FUCK MAN... niama.. summoh he dare to say he dont need me and he hates me n he wants to leave me i force him to be wid me and i force him to go bali and he's with me cuz of money.. niama. ok la.. u with me cause of money so i bought u off with money lar.. so ure MINE WAD.. I OWN U WAD. SO WANNA TALK WAD... mother fucker chibai fucker... NIAMA>.. den bloody hell.. on your birthday... ask me stay over for what... keep on nyerrhh meh when i say kenot for what.... in bali that time keep insisting stay longer for what... keep saying come again with me for what.. entertain me meh? LAN AR??

BETTER STILL.. COMPLAIN COLLEGE NO FRIENDS?? WHY ?? WHY?? WHY CANNOT MAKE FRIENDS GEH?!??!?! fucker... ure fucking problem lar why...

niama... summoh say i take him for granted?? MEH LAN ORH?? like him taking me for granted lor?? since when other way round.. even in farking bali oso have to layan him like hell... *not that i minded when i was in bali cuz seriously i had a great time theere.. but im just pointing it out* den come back kl also layan him like hell eidi. once in a while just pamper me abit.. also kenot. if i juz merajuk abit.. wah.. 1 tight slap across my face... den sounding like hell.. then all the break up shit again....

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

HUR HUR HUR.. fucking stress now i tell u.. serious wan.. my heart like BAM BAM BAM.. breath also kenot breath properly... chibai... ask me pay his phone bill summoh.. MAGEHAI... fucking throw my camera sppoil liao.. i have to buy new 1... pay for ure registration for ure phone... break my mothers crystals cuz angry.. den still demand so much and say i take him for granted... NIAMAGA CHOW HAI...

ok ok..sorry.. dun talk abt that fucker eidi.. must calm down must calm down... *breath in.. breath out..breath in...breath out*

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

hmmm.. exams are next week.. and im 0% prepared.. WOOHOO~!! best of the best.. maybe this sunday will b the 1st time after 5 months i open my sejarah book.. mwahhahahahhaa.. cool eh... and actually do some of my physics...bio....chemistry n addmaths.. lalallala...

URGHHH... im sorry!! I JUST CANT BLOG PROPErly!! too fucking irritated at that jackass!!

WHYY WHYYY WHYYY!! WHY WILL I LOVE SUCH A RETARDED MOTHER FUCKER?? SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHY!!?!??!?!?!?!?!

-BabyGinz-

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

i have been incredibly cranky since i came back from bali. like seriously. i cried at the bali airport because i refused to go home knowing that coming back to KL would be a right pain in the ass.. and i was right... coming back to kl has brought nothing but tears.. frustration..annoyance..and panic...

dammit.. i told my mum i was going to bali for 4 days and i friggin forgot abt my passport and it has the bloody date stamped on so i tried messing it up and now my friggin passport looks so very obvious that i was meddling with it..and better still.. I DID NOT SUCCEED IN DOING ANYTHING ABOUT THE DATE.. fucks it..so i left my passport at ian's hse and now my friggin mum has been harassing me about it.. and im so fucking moody and irritated...

as if that wasn't enough.. the teacher's in school have suddenly decided to go whack on me by adding tons and tons of workload.. LIKE MASS AMOUNTS compared to usual.. and u know what..the school nearly got me fucked because i clearly already told them i was going to bali and they fucking called my dad.. HELLO..U DUMBASS PEOPLE.. MY BUSINESS LOR.. TIU... fuckers.... me and the rest of my family had to lie to my dad about who i was going with and here the school is calling him..HELLO.. FOR THE PAST FUCKING 9 YEARS OF MY LIFE IN SSG U PPL DONT BOTHER AND ALL OF A SUDDEN U CALL MY DAD INSTEAD OF MY MUM?? WTH IS WRONG WITH U FUCKHEADS? and summoh i nicely tell u all ready.. mother fuckers.. yeah. so ive been skipping school a lot.. so what the fuck?? do i not complete my work?? do i not answer your questions when asked?? do i not hand in my homework?? what the mother fucking hell is wrong with u fucking retards....

i feel so dead.. so URGH!! after coming back to KL.. i dont know ian anymore again..i cant tell the real him from the fake him.. who was i with in bali? why is he so different in kl?

fuck KL...

i just want to go back to bali and stay there T_T....

-BabyGinz-